urbanfuck:

urbanfuck:

urbanfuck:

anal sneezes are cute as shit

sorry iphone the word i was looking for was “animal” sneezes better luck next time

this is not what i want to be remembered for

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

you wanna take this outside??? you wanna take this to the park? you wanna look at the stars with me? you wanna go out for a romantic dinner afterwards?? 

Me:  *gets on bus* omg everyone is watching me and judging me and they're going to laugh when the bus starts and im not sitting down, omg dont put your ticket in the wrong way or everyone will judge you and laugh at you.
Me:  *goes to pay for shopping* omg what if I dont have enough money? *counts money out 20 times* what if I look stupid, or say the wrong thing? am I standing in the right spot even? What if someone else wants to get past and im in the way, omg.
Me:  *says hey to someone online* omg, they arent replying, holy shit why am I so annoying? what if they tell their friends how annoying and lame I am? Why am I like this, holy shit.
Me:  *meets someone new* What if they dont like me and dont want me to be around, I shouldnt have met them, im going to be a burden, they're probably critisizing me right now, why am I the way I am?